Need some Writing Help please.......

[chris68]

I am writing a memo out to some internal employees out in our field (not at the corporate location) and wondered if you would be so kind for input on how this is worded.  I also am having trouble with the closing that bossie wants to have something to the affect that Finance Secretary (me) will be checking to make sure these reports are received by the due date and will be calling if they are late.



Here is what I have so far:



"Please be advised that in addition to the current distribution of the finance reports, two copies need to be sent to Contracts Dept. to the attention of Mr. B and Finance Dept. Mr. C.  These reports need to be sent to our office by the same date as they need to be sent to the Big Cahuna's office on the 20th of each month."



Any assistance would be greatly appreciated, just want it to sound correct and get what needs to be said done so it's understood.



Chris68



CG, hope that helps ya.

[andrea843]

I'd make that closing statement less "nice" more clearly stating your expectation.. saying perhaps:



These reports must be rec'd in our office by such and such a date in order to have them complied and forwarded to corporate. If you anticipate problems meeting this deadline, contact:  yadda yadda yadda, otherwise, your compliance is expected and appreciated....

[countrigal]

Chris, I'd love to help but I'm confused... is it possible to input dummy data instead of xxx so that I can tell if "this office" is the same as those already listed, etc.  (ie. sample reports sent to A office attention Mr. B and Mrs. C.)



Off the top of my head I would change the last line to something like "Due to a suspense date of 20 Aug for C Office, this office will be tracking receipt of these reports.  They must be received in this office NLT xxAug."

[chris68]

I think between the two posts and what I have already, I have something for bossie to look at that sounds reasonable.  It's on his desk awaiting his approval.



Thanks guys.

Chris68