I'm not working at the moment, been out of the work world for 2 years (not counting a short stint at an engineering firm).  My past jobs include:  keeping development schedules and project work at a toy company (that job was in Product Management-I was being groomed for that, but my boss was fired, I was moved, became a phones, dictation, and filing drone, and quit.  Boo hoo!); project work plus support for Operations in a merchandising company (my first job); setting up a new AS400 system plus glorifed data entry work at another toy company; production scheduling, reporting, and payroll for a plastics company.  My very last job, a part-time one at the above mentioned engineering firm, was a strictly phones-filing-typing-mailings job-and the one I learned the least at, since I didn't pick up any new skills.  Contrary to what some "managers" think of this type of job, I picked up a lot of very diverse skills along the way, which I can use to my advantage when I re-enter the job market (I hope)!

Very well said, Kittie.  I was really peeved when my former company became upset when I had to take my son for his well-baby checkups (if I couldn't get an appointment before my start time, well, the baby needed his shots!) and especially when they wouldn't let me go home early so I could avoid driving in a snowstorm!  That showed me the company didn't care about my child's safety and welfare.  All they cared about was I wouldn't be around to be a backup admin.  They even told me in so many words that my mother-in-law was watching him, so he should be HER  concern!  I don't think so-I'm his mother-he's MY responsibility!  Clearly, I was the wrong person for this job (I don't know why I was hired when I TOLD them that my son's needs came FIRST!), and when I was laid off, I was relieved.  If they could not respect the fact that my child came first, that was not a place where I wanted to work.

I am upset for Bridget because they SHOULD respect the fact that she's a mother as well as an employee.  But the way things are, some employers put women into a position where they have to choose.  I chose my kids.

BTW, Super, my baby girl's name is Holly.  

Edited by lioness70 on 31/01/02 06:43 PM.

I statred that last job that didn't work out on December 6, 2000 (I came across the date while throwing out my old Day Planner pages)...and I was bonding with my beautiful new baby girl exactly a year later, December 6, 2001!

Things really did change in a year, and for the better!

The baby is a girl, born on December 6.  Wow, time flies-she's almost 2 months old now!

I've been lurking for a long while.  Especially now, I don't have much time to post!

I haven't posted here in a long time, but I know firsthand how you're feeling.  It did, partially, cost me my job.  I was the one working as a part-time admin last year.  I couldn't make the distinction between being a mommy and being an employee.  I admit that I was not taking the job seriously because I really didn't want to be working again.  I was complaining about the same things you were-they wouldn't let me leave early during snowstorms to take the baby home safely, they didn't like me calling to check up on the baby, even if I did it rarely.  I agree with the poster who said that employers should cut new moms some slack, but the fact is, many of them don't, and this one didn't.  In the end, everyone got their wish.  They got someone who didn't have the usual kid hassles (all the other AAs in that office had grown or no kids-that should have been a red flag to me), and I returned home to be with my son.  In fact, I got pregnant again duing the run of that job, and I doubt they would have kept me on after the baby (a girl, born in early December) was born.  I agree with everyone else-even if your heart isn't in the job, you have to hide your true feelings and be a professional if you want to keep the job.  It's not advice I could follow, because I really wanted to be with my babies, but unfortunately, that's the way the business world is.  They need to keep running, whether you're a mom or not.

Eeeeewww.  I don't know if you want to even remain here.  That's your choice.  But I had a problem like that with a p/t AA job last year.  My son was then a year-old-I was the only one in the company with a small child, BTW-and one reason I was let go was because I couldn't give the time to the company that they wanted.  Very puzzling because they knew my situation up front and they knew I'd have to take time off for sickness, doctor appointments, anything else that crops up with young kids, etc.  They even got mad at me once for daring to ask to leave early so I could get the baby home before a bad snowstorm!!!  The president wasn't very understanding because he had a NANNY to watch his kids.  He paid for day care and nannies for senior employees!  I'm not joking!  Bosses and companies like these-especially your boss-are full of red flags for a working mom-work consumes his free time, doesn't like kids...He'll never be understanding when it comes to your child or these doctor appointments.   I'd start looking around for a more family-friendly place, but again, it's your choice.  

Edited by lioness70 on 27/11/01 01:54 PM.

Andrea said it best:  the conflict you're having is whether or not you're able to work with the existing staff, and like them or not, they've brought something into the team or they wouldn't BE there.

I learned this painful lesson about a year ago with regards to lack of communication and "not fitting in with the team."  I took a p/t AA job, and I was basically let on my own to figure out the job.  My mistake was not establishing a clear line of communication with the Office Manager.  We didn't seem to have a good rapport from the get-go and we barely communicated-which came back to haunt me later on, when she threw a bad performance review at me.  I tried to work things out and establish that clear communication, but by then, it was way too late.  I was laid off about a month later.

What I'm saying is similar to what the others said:  if you're not able to work out these conflicts with these other secretaries, then maybe this is not the job for you.  I took that p/t job way too hastily and learned too late that it was a bad fit for both me and them.  Also, it is true that getting coworkers to vouch for you against these other secretaries is indeed creating office dsiharmony, and if this gets any worse, YOU'LL be seen as the instigator and YOU'LL be the one out on the street in the end.   Like the others said, the fact that you're a new hire makes things much. much shakier.  Listen to me:  I was that new hire who threw a wrench into an already comfortable group of secretaries, and guess what?  I lost-not them!

So I say-you should do some serious thinking about whether this job is right for you or not!

Funny!  I'm into astrology (guess MY sign) and had a good chuckle!

Why, if her intention was to get rid of the kid, couldn't she leave it with relatives instead of leaving it to suffocate in the car???  If that is the case and this wasn't an accident, she's in the same league with these women who throw their newborns in trash cans, and that girl who gave birth at the prom and left the baby to die in a toilet.  I DO NOT GET what goes through their minds!



I too had a lot of pictures of my little boy on my desk, and the first few days of work, I almost CRIED.  I couldn't take my mind off the baby!



Sick, sick, sick.

How could she use "I have a lot on my mind" as an excuse???  I don't buy it!  And how on earth could she forget one if both kids were in the car?  That blows my mind!



I was a working mom (even if only for a little while), and even though I wasn't a CEO of a hospital, I had enough on my mind-but NOT ENOUGH to forget about my baby!!!  Even if my baby is SLEEPING, I don't forget he's in the car wih me!



When are people going to wake up and realize that their kids are precious gifts?  These kinds of stories make me sick!

 

I have some good news from my post from yesterday (the WTC thread).  My BIL's best man is OK.  He works next to the Towers and he got out of there as soon as the first plane hit.



I'm still sorting out my feelings over this.  I'm not as numb as I was yesterday, but I'm still outraged.  I cannot believe some of the things that are being posted on other forums.  Some people are saying that the USA deserved this because of all our covert operations in other countries.  How wrong.  How wrong!  Those people were INNOCENT!!!  I pray for our country, for those who lost loved ones, and for those who are still looking for loved ones.



No longer anonymous, I am, Lisa Spinelli from Jackson, New Jersey.

I turned on the TV this morning after my mother told me that two planes crashed into the WTC.  I will never forget the horror of seeing one of them collapse on live TV.  I sat there in shock.  I can't even comprehend what the people who were there when those buildings collapsed went through.  Or the people who were on those hijacked planes.  I cried and couldn't stop.  All those people...all these lives lost...for what?  I turned off the TV when they reported that people in Palestine were dancing in the streets.  After countless innocent people lost their LIVES.  I couldn't take any more.



My BIL's best man's office was at the Twin Towers.  I only pray that he got out in time.



Words cannot express what I saw today.  God Bless and pray for all those families.

I never thought of the far left, but great point, GE.  Now is not the time for EITHER extremist side to be pushing their views.  Let the families grieve and leave the nonsense OUT.

I'm Catholic, and I don't know how many of you know about apocalyptic Marian apparitions, but these Catholic extremists/fundamentalists, as I call them, are also coming out of the woodwork.  Their views about this tragedy are basically along the lines of Falwell and Robertson, and they use unapproved by Rome Marian apparitions to back up their views.  They even have ties to Robertson and some of these out-there "ministries" (after doing some research on who they supported and who is linked to their websites).  I was very disgusted by that Falwell and Robertson said and even MORE disgusted when I saw that some Catholics approved of what they said!  While I agree that our society has cut God out to a great degree and we need to bring Him back into our lives, every person needs to discover how to do this on their own terms.  I don't mean to offend anybody who isn't particularly religious.  I don't like religion being rammed down my throat by these extremists, and these people really need to keep their agendas away from the grieving families.  Such crass insensitivity shown at such a time of mourning.

I was fortunate not to have this happen to me, but I knew of admins who were fired and/or demoted because of sexual harassment.  I was, though, subjected to a hostile workplace by a boss who did not like me, and I had to quit because when I complained, nobody believed me...they tried to take disciplinary action against ME-I had such a bad case of nerves, which I NEVER had before, because of this man that I was ready to go out on stress leave and on medication, ordered by my doctor!  Anything that makes the workplace uncomfortable for anyone should NEVER be tolerated!  Unfortunately, and this is a very sad comment about the business world, but a lot of times, when confronted with these situations, the employers look the other way because the person doing the harassing is in a power position-and the company feels it can't afford to lose that person.  This attitude is terrible and devalues admins in a way-"Well, even though you have a valid complaint, it isn't as important because we can replace you."  (I actually heard that from an HR person who left a company.  Her ethics got to her after finding herself in these situations too often.)  I agree with everyone else to document up the wazoo, and if they give you a hard time, leave the company.  You'll know you're not valued there if they won't listen to what you have to say.