Message #70647

[Cathy S]

I am still thinking about the how to suggest you address the overall situation and with whom ... but one thing is for sure you need urgently to find a way to reiterate that you are not his scapegoat.

I had an example of this the other day where my boss was told I had given his availability incorrectly ... I keep an audit trail of everything and was able to demonstrate that I had done nothing wrong.  My boss knew that I would have this trail but that only comes with working with someone over time.

So first off please make sure you do keep a trail of what you do on behalf of this person.  Then you need to let them know directly that you are not to blame for their lateness, etc.  You may be able to adapt this technique:  Ask to have a brief discussion and explain using BOFF (Behaviour, Outcome, Feelings, Future) - eg:

B  “I have just taken a call from Mr X's office and I understand that you told him that I had given him the wrong time for his appointment; I had e-mailed his Secretary with the arrangements, as well as phoning her,
O  and it is clear that he was given the correct time which was also the time in your diary.
F  I am upset that you took this action but I also feel it undermines your professional image with an important client. 
F  I am committed to working with you to help you establish yourself in XYZ Corp; which means I recognise the importance of your appointments being appropriately scheduled.  If you need me to allow additional time between appointments in future please let me know so we can ensure you are not late again."

It takes a little practise to phrase the statements in a careful way that makes the point but is not accusing.  Practice on friends and family first if you can.  But remember the longer you leave this unaddressed the worse it will get.

It is equally powerful for giving positive reinforcement - so if there is something your boss does really well, that makes you feel valued and you feel you can develop with/for them use that as an introduction phrased as a BOFF.

Do please let us know how you get on.