Two Cows

[ozbound]

The "Two Cow Explanation" Of What Makes...



A SOCIALIST: You have two cows. The government

takes one and gives it to your neighbor.



A DEMOCRAT: You have two cows. Your neighbor

has none. You feel guilty for being successful. You

vote people into office who tax your cows, forcing

you to sell one to raise money to pay the tax. The

people you voted for then take the tax money and buy

a  cow and give it to your neighbor. You feel righteous.



A REPUBLICAN: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. So what?



A COMMUNIST: You have two cows. The government

seizes both and provides you with milk.



A FASCIST: You have two cows. The government seizes

both and sells you the milk. You join the  underground

and start a campaign of sabotage.



CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE: You have two cows.

You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.



BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE: You have two

cows. The government takes them both, shoots one,

milks the other, pays you for the milk, then pours the

milk down the  drain.



AN AMERICAN CORPORATION: You have two cows.

You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk

of four cows. You are surprised when the cow drops

dead.



A FRENCH CORPORATION: You have two cows. You

go on strike because you want three cows.



A JAPANESE CORPORATION: You have two cows.

You redesign them so they are one tenth the size of an

ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.



A GERMAN  CORPORATION: You have two cows.

You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years,

eat once a month, and milk themselves.



AN ITALIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows but

you don't know where they are. You break for lunch.



A RUSSIAN  CORPORATION: You have two cows.

You count them and learn you have five cows. You

count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You

count them again and learn you have 12 cows. You

stop counting cows and open another bottle of

vodka.



AN INDIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows.

You worship them.



A SWISS CORPORATION: You have 5000 cows,

none of which belongs to you. You charge for storing

them for others.

 

[dragonladybug]

Loved it - makes it all very clear, doesn't it?

DLB / Debra